Sermon Transcript
Well, let’s take a look at our Scripture passage for this morning, Mark 10:35-45. We’re going to have it up on the screens for you as well, Mark 10:35-45. Then James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to him, came to Jesus. Teacher, they said, we want you to do for us whatever we ask. What do you want me to do for you?
Jesus asked them. They replied, let one of us sit at your right and the other at your left in your glory. You don’t know what you’re asking, Jesus said. Can you drink the cup I drink or be baptized with the baptism I am baptized with? We can, they answered.
Jesus said to them, You will drink the cup I drink, and you will be baptized with the baptism I am baptized with. But to sit at my right or my left is not for me to grant. These places belong to those for whom they have been prepared. When the 10 heard about this, the other 10 disciples, they became indignant with James and John. Jesus called them together and said, You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them.
Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give His life as a ransom for many. This morning, we’re going to see 4 points out of this text. So, number one, we will see the problem with what this morning we are going to call me first, the problem with thinking I’m more important, the problem with thinking I want more than you, the problem with thinking I want to be first, me first.
What’s the problem with that? Second, we’ll see the prevalence of the me first phenomenon, how widespread me first is. Then we’ll look at the prescription for me first. What is the cure for this plague that has now spread everywhere? Finally, we’ll see the power that we need to take our prescription because odds are we aren’t going to enjoy the medicine very much.
So we have a problem, prevalence, prescription, power. That’s where we’re headed today. The first 2 are going to go fairly quick because we already know them. We are very familiar with the first 2. And the 3rd and 4th ones, I’m just guessing, are going to require some convincing.
So first, the problem with me first. What’s the matter with trying to get ahead of others? Isn’t that sort of the whole point of life? Push yourself up to the top? In our text, James and John see an opportunity for advancement.
Now, they had been early adopters in this Jesus movement, and now they were pretty sure this Jesus guy could amount to something. So they did what we might do if we were the first 2 of a group of employees at a tech startup that looked like it might be about to go big. What would we do? We would make sure that we are going to get ours. And while we were at it, we might try to see if we could get a little higher percentage of the payoff than those around us.
Jesus, they ask, can we sit at your right and your left in glory? Like, can we have the number 1 and number 2 seats behind you? Now, Jesus, you’re the King, that’s fine. We are not trying to take your spot. We know you’re the CEO, you’re the president, you’re number 1.
Fantastic. But could we be next, right after that? And we know these other 10 guys have been around just as long as we have, a little bit longer than us, actually, but can we have a higher position than them? Now, what’s the problem with that? They may as well try, right?
What’s the matter with trying to get ahead of others?
We know what’s the matter. With that because we’ve been the others before when someone has been trying to get ahead of us. Just last week I was at the park with my son and while he was patiently waiting for his turn in line on the slide, some other terribly sinful child hooligan tried to cut in front of the 5 or 6 kids waiting to get on the slide. Now, what did the other kids do when this one kid came in out of nowhere and said, me first! What did they say?
You’ve been in that line before, right? They yelled at him. Pushing and shoving started. I heard one, I’m going to tell my mom! The problem with me first is that it breaks unity.
Me first breaks unity. It incites the others against us, which is exactly what happened when James and John asked Jesus if they could be first. Verse 41, the other 10 disciples were indignant with them. Whenever someone tries to take a favorable position over others, the others don’t like it very much. In fact, if you want a rift in a relationship, if things have been going a little too smoothly for you lately, and you’re wondering a surefire way to start an argument, just say, me first, me more, and that will take care of your peace and quiet.
So husbands and wives, just start saying things like, while I sit on the couch and watch Netflix, how about you clean up from dinner? Tonight? How about you pick up the toys that the kids missed? How about you collect the trash from around the house? How about you pay the bills?
How about you pack my bag for the trip I’m about to go on? And while you’re at it, make me a sandwich.
You’ll be arguing in no time. It’ll fix your peace and quiet. If you’ve been getting along too well with your neighbors lately, just start parking your car in front of their driveway. Because it’s more convenient for you. Let your dog do his business in their yard and don’t clean it up because, I mean, really, it is too much for somebody as important as you to spend your time picking up dog business, right?
And if they didn’t want that in their yard, then they just shouldn’t have had a yard in the first place, right? You can take out your trash cans at 2 AM as loudly as possible and don’t return anything that you borrowed. Just value yourself above them. It’ll start an argument. Coworkers, just take credit for their work, ask them to bring you coffee because, again, you’re too valuable for such a task, and as often as you can work it into conversation, remind them that you have a better education than they do.
Anytime we value ourselves more than we value other people, anytime we count ourselves as more significant, anytime we count them as less significant, anytime we do that, unity is threatened or destroyed altogether. That’s the problem with me first. Now, the prevalence of it, verse 42, Jesus says, you know that those who are considered rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. Jesus says, You know how it works out in the world. He’s talking as if it’s a foregone conclusion, and it is.
Rulers hold their position with power. Great ones throw around their authority. I’m in charge, so me first. I get the best parking spot. I get the most vacation time.
You know how it works, Jesus says. Maybe in families. I make the money, so I get to spend most of it. In churches, maybe, I want my preferences prioritized over your preferences because I’ve been here longer and I give more money than you do. When you’ve been here as long as me or if you have given as much, then you can have an opinion.
Until then, zip it. That’s the way it goes, Jesus says. It’s our default. We see people enrich themselves at the expense of others. We see people with the ability to make or break somebody else’s career use that ability to manipulate and control.
We see people without any kind of power at all claim they deserve more than others because they don’t have any power. They use the fact they are powerless as powerful leverage to get what they want. We call it entitlement. The other end of that spectrum is elitism. I have more than you, so I can dismiss you.
I don’t need to consider your ideas because who are you, after all? Wherever we find ourselves on that continuum, our tendency is to use what we have to benefit ourselves because that’s the way people are. We can think about what we might be likely to do if we could get away with it. If there’s anything we currently aren’t doing, but we would do if we could get away with it? Goodness is not what’s keeping us from it, lack of power is.
So if we had that power, we would use it to benefit ourselves at the cost of others. It’s what James and John were trying to do, make a power play to benefit themselves with whatever leverage they could find. But Jesus stares all that straight in the face, and He says, not so with you, verse 43. If you are following me, it’s different. We are going to be different.
Jesus’ followers will not participate in the prevalence of me first.
Which brings us to the prescription. What’s the cure for this problem? And like I said, this is where our friction with Jesus is going to start. The prescription for me first is humility.
Humility is the answer. So what is humility and how can it help? First, let’s clear the air on some of what humility isn’t. Many times I don’t think we want to be humble because we associate humility with cowardice, with being unsure of ourselves, somehow with weakness. So let’s fix that.
Humility is not, among other things, downplaying our achievements. Someone says, great job, and we become all shy and awkward and we say, oh no, it really wasn’t all that good. I should have done better. Here’s where I messed up. That’s not humility.
That’s insecurity. That’s being too self-conscious, but it’s not humility. Because was Jesus humble? Obviously. But when someone thanked him or was amazed when he did something like perform a miracle, he never said anything like, oh no, it really wasn’t all that good.
I could have done better. In fact, one time when he healed 10 people and only one of the 10 returned to thank him, he said, where are the other 9 at? How come you’re the only one that came back to thank me? And yet, he was humble. So what is it?
Unfortunately, it’s much more difficult and it’s much deeper than just learning a canned response of what to say when somebody gives you a compliment. It’s a lot harder than that. Philippians 2:3 defines it this way and actually refers to Jesus while doing so. In humility, consider or count others more significant than yourselves. Other versions say value others more than you value yourself.
Humility is others before self. You first instead of me first. You first on the slide. You get shotgun in the car. Your preferences over my preferences, your desires ahead of my desires.
I’ll pack your bag. Whatever amount of power or leverage I have, I’m using it for your benefit instead of using it for my benefit. That’s humility. That’s what Jesus did every second of His life. Now, that makes us extremely uncomfortable, but don’t worry, we’re about to be even more uncomfortable.
But then hopefully it will get better. Do you know who lives out this principle extremely well? If we were going to point to one group and say, they are what we are talking about when we talk about humility, they perfectly illustrate how all of us should treat everyone around us. Do you know who the they are?
Do you know what group that would be? You’re not going to like the answer at all, but it’s the illustration Jesus gave, so just don’t shoot the messenger, okay? We’ll agree to that up front. Slaves.
That’s who. Slaves are, by definition, humble. Others’ needs come ahead of their own needs. Jesus says, verse 44, be a slave of all. Be a slave of everyone.
Sometimes our English Bibles like to soften that term and translate it as servant instead of slave, but the word Jesus uses here and the word that is used other places like 2 Corinthians 4:5, Paul instructs us to be slaves of each other. 1 Corinthians 9:19, Paul says he is a slave to all men. The word really is slave. There is a word for servant, which Jesus actually said in verse 43, and there is a word for slave, which He used here in verse 44. Now, obviously, the word slave gives us some trouble, gives some trouble to our modern ears, because when we hear slave, we automatically, we can’t help it, think about slavery in the American South before the Civil War.
We think about Caribbean islands. We think about New World slavery is what we think of. We think of graphic films we have seen with abuse and mistreatment, people being torn away from their families, and we wonder, how could God possibly want us to be like that? Answer, He doesn’t. Because slavery in the Greco-Roman world was far different than slavery that comes to our minds when we hear the term.
In the Greco-Roman world— this is going to go fast, so feel free to ask questions afterwards if you need to— in the Greco-Roman world, slaves were paid a wage, Did you know that? They weren’t simply provided room and board, they were paid, and their pay was no different than a free laborer doing a similar task. They weren’t paid less because they were slaves, which means slaves were almost never poor, because if you were a slave, it meant you had an income, because you’d have an income from being a slave, so you have an income. They could often buy their own freedom if they wanted to. Slaves had the same level of education as the rest of society.
Slavery was rarely, if ever, lifelong, 10 or 20 years maybe, and there was no way to distinguish between a slave and another person in society, meaning it was not race-based slavery, and the clothing slaves wore was exactly the same clothing as everybody else in society wore. They had the same language everybody else spoke, so there’s no way to tell who’s a slave, who’s not. Obviously, that is far different than the lifelong race-based slavery of the American South and other places where slaves were acquired through kidnapping, which, by the way, slavery through kidnapping is explicitly forbidden in both the Old and New Testaments of the Bible. So, if you ever hear, oh, the Bible supports slavery, it’s not as simple as all of that. Paul, when speaking to slaves, he says, if you can get free, do it.
And when Paul’s speaking directly to a slave owner in the little letter to Philemon, he says, Philemon, if you’re actually acting out the principles of love, that we are commanded to follow as Christians, you’re going to let your slave go free. That’s what he says when he’s talking to a slave owner. So there’s no way that we could just blanket statement say, oh, the Bible supports slavery. And we can also see, given everything else the Bible says about slavery, why Christians during the 1700s and 1800s were willing to fight with every ounce of strength they had to end slavery. Christians during that time period immediately and passionately opposed the permanent race-based slavery slavery acquired through kidnapping that we’ve seen in all the movies because of what the Bible said about it.
You say, weren’t there Christians on both sides of that debate? Yes, of course, there were. However, the abolitionists were able to win in the North, for instance, in England, for instance, the abolitionists were able to win the argument because they convinced the other side what the Bible truly said about the issue. England didn’t need to have a war comparable to the U.S. to get this sorted out. They just eventually submitted to Scripture.
That’s a nice history lesson, but that brings us back to Jesus. What was He talking about when He said we should be slaves of everyone? What was Paul talking about when he said we are all to be slaves of each other? Even if the slavery Jesus was pointing to when He said that we should be slaves Doesn’t look anything like the slavery we think of when we hear the term. He was still pointing to something when he said you should be slaves.
So what was the something? 2 markers, probably more, of slavery in that time period. Number one, you couldn’t quit. What’s the difference between a slave and a hired worker doing the exact same job? If the slave and hired worker, they were paid the same, educated the same, looked the same, dressed the same, What’s the difference?
The slave couldn’t quit. The slave couldn’t say, instead of working for you, enough of that, I’m going to work for you over here. Couldn’t do that. Second, there was no doubt who the slave counted as more significant. There was no doubt who the slave treated with greater value.
The slave was humble before the master. The master was more significant and treated with more value. Jesus is saying that’s how all of us need to treat and value all the rest of us. The people sitting next to you right now, be their slave.
You think that would do something for our unity if we all did that?
And it’s not be the slave of some of the others sitting around us, it’s be the slave of all of the others sitting around us. This is the can’t quit aspect. It’s not, well, I really like these people, so I will treat them as if they had superior value and honor, but I don’t really like these people, so I won’t treat them that way. And in fact, I’m going to try to kind of avoid them. Can’t do that.
Sorry. A slave can’t avoid the master. We are bound to these people over here that we don’t like and must treat them as if they had more significance than ourselves. Now, some of us, because you’re as wicked as I am, some of us will immediately try to flip this around and start looking at those around us demanding that they listen to this message and start treating us with superior value. We’ll look at the people around us and say, you really ought to be humble.
You aren’t humble enough.
That’s not the command. The command is not that others would serve you.
The command is not that others would give you preference. That’s not it. The command is to you. So husbands and wives, do not, do not go home and say to each other, did you hear what the preacher said?
You need to give preference to me. You need to serve me. No, please. We have enough counseling appointments already. We don’t need that.
If you do that, you’re going to be right back to the me first thing, which is what we’re trying to correct in the first place. If instead, however, you both go home, you both go home, both of you go home with the attitude, I’m going to defer all preference to my spouse. If you both do that, you’ll have a unity you wouldn’t have been able to imagine before. Whoever we have conflicting views with right now, our neighbor, a friend, boss, parent, someone here at church, person on Facebook we disagree with politically, the action step coming out of here is not, it is not, they need to give preference to me. They need to see it my way.
They need to do it my way. They need to be more humble.
No! That’s just twisting this back around to me first again. That’s falling back into the pattern of this world that Jesus says is so prevalent. That’s doing what everybody else does. Our action step coming out of here is to look at the person with whom we have conflicting views and say, your needs come ahead of my needs.
I work for your good, before I work for my good. Always. And I can’t get out of this arrangement because I’m a slave.
Now, we’re uncomfortable with that. Others before self is completely antithetical to everything that we are. Our fear— I’ll just name it for you— our fear is that we will be a doormat. Others will take advantage of us, others will run us over. We don’t always want to serve, we want to get our way sometimes, most of the time.
We want to be able to quit, we want to be able to walk away from certain people. The patterns of this world are the patterns inside of us. When Jesus says, you know the way it is out there, He’s really saying, you know the way that it is inside of you. And for Him to come down flatly without any wiggle room and say, you aren’t going to be the way that you are, must mean that something fairly drastic is going to need to take place, which brings us to our final point, the power to take our prescription. The power to act humbly is the surprising joy that we experience in humility, the joy that happens when we do this.
Our fear, again, is that by enslaving ourselves to others, we won’t get what we want. They will get their way instead of us getting our way. And we think because of that, we will have less, that we will be less, that we will be a doormat trampled on by everyone. So, How can we get past those feelings? And here’s the tricky part.
What could I say that could ever make it attractive to want to get past those feelings? So, ready? Here we go. How do we get past those feelings? We change what we want.
If our fear is that by serving others we won’t get what we want, then we need to change what we want. So some examples. You can think about the quarterback who puts his team’s needs ahead of his own and takes a lower salary so the team can afford to hire more talent around the quarterback in hopes of winning a championship. Now, here’s the question. Is that quarterback getting taken advantage of?
Is the quarterback getting what he wants? It depends, right? If what he wanted most was the biggest possible salary, taking a smaller salary so the team could pursue championships, that would be very upsetting. The team would be smashing his dreams so they could fulfill their own. He’d be a doormat.
But what if he wanted championships the most and taking a lower salary got him the thing that he wanted most? Then he’d be happy about it. It would be hard to say the team had walked all over him if he got the thing that he wanted the most, right? It’s hard to be a doormat when you’re getting the thing that you want. It’s difficult to carry that label.
It’s the exact same circumstances, right? Lower salary for potential of more championships. One way, he’s a doormat. The other way, he’s completely fulfilled. The only difference is what he wants.
So, just by changing what he wants, he goes from doormat to joyful. Or you can think about George Washington, founder of our great country. He was given unrestricted power and authority by Continental Congress to command the military and do whatever was necessary for as long as necessary to win the war. When the war was over, Washington voluntarily turned his sword over to Congress, giving up the position of king or emperor, which so many people wanted him to take, and he placed himself under the authority of Congress. Here’s the question: Was he a doormat?
Did Congress take advantage of his weakness?
Anybody here want to be the one to call George Washington weak?
I mean, he gave up his power and authority and status, right? He gave up his own benefit to benefit someone else. So, is that weak? Is it? Again, it depends, right?
If he wanted to be king, if that’s what he’d been striving for, and let’s face it, he earned it. So, if he earned it and he wanted it, and then somehow he got talked out of it and he resigned his commission in bitterness, then yeah, he was a weak doormat. But as far as we can tell, what he wanted most was to establish the people’s rule through elected officials over both the military and those elected officials. He didn’t want there to be a king that ruled the military and the Congress. He wanted the people to be in charge of the military and the Congress.
That was foundational for him. So, he could joyfully give up his authority because it helped him achieve the thing that he wanted the most. He is not a doormat because he got exactly what he wanted. Now, here is the question for us Christians: What do we want most? What is the thing that we want more than every other thing?
If we want a comfortable life, if we want comfort, if we want recognition, if we want financial security, if we want praise, if we want control, it’s going to be nearly impossible to put others ahead of ourselves because we will need to give up comfort, recognition, security, praise in order to put others first. And if we somehow end up giving those up, we’ll do it with clenched teeth and bitterness in our hearts, and we’ll feel like a doormat. Because someone is taking the thing that we want the most. But what if we wanted something else the most? What if we wanted to know Christ and make Him known more than anything else?
What if that were primary?
If it were, then when we had opportunity to put ourselves second or last, we would get excited about the possibility, because doing so would display Christ to others. Jesus tells us, verse 44, we are to be slaves of everyone, for, because, why are we to do this, Jesus? Why are we to be slaves of everyone? Verse 45, because Jesus came to serve and give His life as a ransom for many. We do it because He did it, but we’re not just copycats.
This is the Matthew 5:16 thing, let your light shine before others so they may praise your Father in heaven. One of the reasons we imitate Christ, one of the reasons we follow in his footsteps of sacrificing ourselves for others is because him giving his life as a ransom to us is our greatest treasure. It is our brightest light. It is our biggest hope. And we want Him on display for the world to see.
His act of self-sacrifice for us is what we hold most dear. It is precious beyond expression, and we don’t just want to tell people about it. We want them to believe it. We want them to— we want us to show it off in every possible way that we can so that they can see this treasure too. So, when we’re going through our day, and something comes up, and we realize we’re at a decision point, it’s either going to be us first or them first.
And we know if they go first, we’re going to be disadvantaged somehow. And we think, I don’t want them to get their way. I want to get my way. I don’t want to make the sandwich, I want her to make the sandwich. I don’t want him to get the praise, I want the praise.
There are probably dozens of these moments every day, right? The slave never had a decision to make in those moments, the job was clear, others go first, period. But we get the choice.
When that moment happens, if we are going to have a chance of deferring to the other person, of being a slave to the other person, if we’re going to do this joyfully, gladly, then we’re going to need to remind ourselves of what we want most, which is to know Christ and make Him known. We want the people around us, we want other people at Bridges, we want our own families, we want our neighbors, we want our coworkers, we want them to look at our lives and be confused. We want them to notice. We want them to ask. And if they don’t ask, we want to volunteer the information anyway.
But we want to draw attention toward why do we do the job no one else wants to do? Why do we give up our praise so easily? Why are we so welcoming of others’ ideas? Why don’t we need to push our own agenda? Why do we defer to others?
Why don’t— why do we sacrifice so much for others? We want the answer to be as bright and as loud as our passion for it. Because we’re putting Christ on display. We’re putting His enormous sacrifice on display. We want you to see it.
We want you to be reminded of it. If you know it already, fantastic! We want you to see it again and again and again. We want Him and what He did to be known. He did it, so we do it.
It will look foolish. To others when we don’t use the perks of our power.
It will definitely hurt sometimes when we put others first and put our needs at the back of the line. But if, and I realize this is a big if, if our deepest desire is to show off Christ who He is, what He did. We will be thrilled when we have a chance to do so, and we won’t feel like a doormat because we’ll be getting exactly the thing that we want the most, displaying Christ for others to see.
Let’s pray.
Father, this is hard for us. Following in Christ’s footsteps is maybe impossible for us in this area. We pray that you would do a transforming work in our heart. We pray that we actually could put others first, and not just in action, but in the way we feel, Lord. Help change the way we feel so that we want to put others first, so that we can display what you did for us.
We ask those things in Jesus’ name. Amen.
